Narcissistic Love
by Sam Keen
The rain was falling against the window of the cafe calmingly as Lucius sipped his coffee. Random bystanders haphazardly walking by the window, interrupting his view of the street. The cafe was mostly full, containing people who were grabbing coffee before work and local college students trying to cram as much of their studies in before class as they could. Lucius’s work had been canceled, much to his dismay. Something to do with a death in his boss’s family. He hated anything that interfered with his daily schedule: his OCD contributed to this flaw. His large tan trench coat was uncomfortable due to the overly heated room. Fortunately, he was almost finished with his coffee.
“Hello,” the soft, high pitched voice said, snapping him out of his thoughts. A women sat straight across from him, wearing a tan trench coat identical to his own. Her blonde, curly hair falling down to her shoulders. Her expression was one of interest and enthusiasm, unbothered by his cold demeanor.
Lucius frowned at her and turned away. He didn't have time for her nor did he want to speak with her. She would probably interrupt his schedule, and that was the last thing he wanted to happen again that same day.
“I see you're not a talker. Fine, I’ll talk. My name is Vivian, Vivian Lachance.” She reached across the table, waiting for Lucius to shake her hand, but all he did was look at her hand with disgust. He then turned away to look out the window that contained more entertainment than what this women was probably capable of offering. Vivian frowned at this. “So that’s how it’s going to be, huh?” She looked at the window with him trying to figure out what was of such interest.
“Please, go away,” Lucius’s hard voice broke the silence that had enveloped them. Regardless of the fact that it was a rude comment, she smiled because he finally spoke.
“There we go, we're making progress,” she clapped her hands with excitement.
Her statement, loud and irritating, didn't seem to bother anyone else. He got up to leave and she made no effort to stop him. However, she did follow him. Lucius didn't notice until he was halfway to his car.
“I said, please go away,” he reverberated in a louder voice and with aggression. Lucius slender frame helped him weave through the crowd of bystanders hoping to lose the mysterious women in the crowd.
His attempt was successful, he managed to get into his car with ease in the back alley parking lot of the cafe. He took a minute to breathe. He then started the car and pulled out of the parking lot onto the road. As Lucius was driving, he heard, “Nice car,” from beside him. He looked over to see Vivian sitting in the passenger seat. He looked back at the road. A car was coming, to avoid a head-on collision, he turned and spun out of control before coming to a complete stop. “WHAT DO YOU WANT!” he yelled out of anger, fear, and annoyance.
“Being kind to me would be a start. But more importantly, a date,” Vivian said with a smile.
Lucius looked at her oddly. “We just met?”
“Think of it as date, you repaying me for being rude,” she said, as if it were the most obvious thing. They drove in silence, Lucius did not know what to say: no one had been interested him in a romantic way before. “Yes or no,” she reiterated, looking over to him with anticipation.
“Oh...Ok,” Lucius stuttered, he still couldn't believe this was happening, the fact that he would even accept something so out of his comfort zone.
“YES!” Vivian shouted throwing her hands around in excitement “Pick me up at the cafe around six PM and we will go from there,” she said as she pointed for Lucius to stop at a corner. “Well, see you in a few hours,” she said as she slammed the car door shut not even giving Lucius a chance to say something.
Lucius looked at his car’s clock and realized he had only five hours to get ready and be back to the cafe. The drive was quick because he only lived about ten minutes from the cafe. He quickly parked his car on the curb and went into his apartment building. The receptionist looked at him quickly then went back to whatever she was working on. Lucius always took the staircase; the elevator had a record of breaking down and being in a small enclosed space was not an option. His apartment was the last one at the end of a rather small hallway. He quickly entered with a sigh of relief. Everything in his apartment was in order and spotless. Lucius hated messes. His job allowed him to have his own private and spacious apartment with no roommate.
He checked his home phone, seeing that he has several missed calls from his mother.
She was probably calling to ask for money or tell him how useless and worthless he was. She had always been abusive to him, since his dad died when he was ten. Leaving the phone, he went to his bedroom to pick out an outfit. It took him quite a bit of time. He found the perfect pieces of clothing to wear: a blue striped polo shirt with jeans.
He quickly got changed and checked the mirror which felt like the fiftieth time. Lucius still couldn't quite understand why he was going through this much effort for a girl he just met. By the time he was done, he had twenty minutes until he had to go and pick her up. He spent the next ten minutes tidying up the mess he made from changing and making reservations.
When he was done, he quickly grabbed his wallet and rushed down the stairs to his car. He began to feel nervous, a feeling he hadn't had since his dad died. The feeling began to get worse as he got closer to the cafe. What if she decided she didn’t want to go on a date or if she decided she was too good for me? He parked in front of the cafe, hoping that she was already there. His hope was crushed when there was no one standing there. Regardless, he got out of his car and stood in front of the cafe, making himself more visible.
He waited for fifteen minutes before considering that possibly Vivian had changed her mind. Before he was about to jump into his car and forget the whole thing happened he heard, “So where are we going?”
The sudden sound scaring Lucius so badly he thought he might have a heart attack. “Don’t sneak up on me like that!” Lucius yelled earning looks from other people, Vivian frowned “That’s not a very good way to start a date,” she said crossing her arms. “I’m sorry, come on I have reservations at the grill.” The grill was one of the more popular restaurants in town and one of Lucius’s favorite places.
The drive there was longer than what he remembered, maybe it was because he was anxious, or he was just hungry. The awkward silence enveloped them the whole way there. Lucius had no idea what to say. He did not have the best social skills, especially with someone whom he was going on a date. When they finally arrived, he let a sigh of relief. He was hopeful that they would be too busy stuffing their face to worry about talking.
He didn’t notice that she had not changed a bit since he last saw her. Vivian was wearing the same tan trench coat as the last time he had seen her. To Lucius, it looked like she had not made any effort for the date whatsoever.
They entered the Grill. “Do you have reservations?” the waitress at the door asked.
“Yes. It’s under Lucius Varner,” he responded.
“Ah yes, table for one,” He looked at the waitress oddly for a second then held up two of fingers. “Follow me,” she said, as she showed the two their table. The table was in the corner of the restaurant, the bar was in the middle, while all the other tables seemed to wrap around it.
“ My name is Emily, and I’ll be your waitress. What can I get for you?” she asked, looking only at Lucius.
“I will have some water and…” he said looking at Vivian.
“I’m good,” Vivian replied as she waved him off.
“That’s it,” he finished.
“I’ll be right back with that, then,” Emily said as she wandered off. Vivian and Lucius spent the next hour or so talking about random subjects. They found out that they had a lot in common, but they also had a lot of differences.
When they got back out to the car they were both laughing and smiling, something Lucius hadn't done in a very long time. He felt warm and fuzzy. He couldn't describe the feeling, simply because he never felt it before. He started the car and began pulling out into the road.
“Thank you for an awesome night,” Vivian said planting a kiss on his cheek. He smiled the whole time he drove. When he turned the corner a bus smashed into them head on.
Lucius woke up in a completely white room: white walls, white sheets, white lights. He tried moving his arms, but they seemed to be restrained. He began to panic. He started jerking the restraining straps. The worst part was that he couldn't feel his right leg. The sheets revealed why; it was missing. Two nurses came rushing in. One was trying to calm him down, while the other took a needle and put it in what seemed to be his IV. Lucius began to feel dizzy and fell into a deep horrible sleep that was full of nightmares.
When he woke again, a large man was sitting in a chair, writing on papers. What they, were Lucius couldn't tell.
“WHO ARE YOU?! WHERE AM I?!” Lucius yelled, anger building up in him.
The man looked up and in a deep, gruff voice said, “You're in the hospital. My names is Detective Durwell. I’m here to ask you about the crash.”
In that moment all the memories came flooding back. Vivian, dinner, crashing, “Where's Vivian?” Lucius asked looking at the detective.
“Vivian?” the detective asked confused.
“Yes, the woman that was in the car with me.”
“Sir there was nobody in the car with you,” the detective replied, shifting in his chair.
“I'm positive Vivian was in the restaurant with me and when I was driving,” Lucius said, trying to stay calm.
“Sir, we had to ask the restaurant if you were under the influence of alcohol. They say you sat there drinking water and barely ate your food. They also said you were talking to yourself in full conversations.” The detective said standing up.
“NO YOU ARE LYING!” Lucius shouted, struggling against his restraints. He knew, just knew, that they were wrong.
“NURSE!” The detective shouted. A nurse responded to his call, running in and putting the morphine into his IV making Lucius fall asleep once again.
It has been six weeks since Lucius’s stay in the hospital. After he recovered, he’s been forced into a psychiatric hospital. His personal nurse was kind enough to reveal that information. He spent most of his days in a wheelchair because of his lost leg, and just staring out the window. Sometimes, if he tried hard enough, he could see Vivian staring right back at him.
“Hello,” the soft, high pitched voice said, snapping him out of his thoughts. A women sat straight across from him, wearing a tan trench coat identical to his own. Her blonde, curly hair falling down to her shoulders. Her expression was one of interest and enthusiasm, unbothered by his cold demeanor.
Lucius frowned at her and turned away. He didn't have time for her nor did he want to speak with her. She would probably interrupt his schedule, and that was the last thing he wanted to happen again that same day.
“I see you're not a talker. Fine, I’ll talk. My name is Vivian, Vivian Lachance.” She reached across the table, waiting for Lucius to shake her hand, but all he did was look at her hand with disgust. He then turned away to look out the window that contained more entertainment than what this women was probably capable of offering. Vivian frowned at this. “So that’s how it’s going to be, huh?” She looked at the window with him trying to figure out what was of such interest.
“Please, go away,” Lucius’s hard voice broke the silence that had enveloped them. Regardless of the fact that it was a rude comment, she smiled because he finally spoke.
“There we go, we're making progress,” she clapped her hands with excitement.
Her statement, loud and irritating, didn't seem to bother anyone else. He got up to leave and she made no effort to stop him. However, she did follow him. Lucius didn't notice until he was halfway to his car.
“I said, please go away,” he reverberated in a louder voice and with aggression. Lucius slender frame helped him weave through the crowd of bystanders hoping to lose the mysterious women in the crowd.
His attempt was successful, he managed to get into his car with ease in the back alley parking lot of the cafe. He took a minute to breathe. He then started the car and pulled out of the parking lot onto the road. As Lucius was driving, he heard, “Nice car,” from beside him. He looked over to see Vivian sitting in the passenger seat. He looked back at the road. A car was coming, to avoid a head-on collision, he turned and spun out of control before coming to a complete stop. “WHAT DO YOU WANT!” he yelled out of anger, fear, and annoyance.
“Being kind to me would be a start. But more importantly, a date,” Vivian said with a smile.
Lucius looked at her oddly. “We just met?”
“Think of it as date, you repaying me for being rude,” she said, as if it were the most obvious thing. They drove in silence, Lucius did not know what to say: no one had been interested him in a romantic way before. “Yes or no,” she reiterated, looking over to him with anticipation.
“Oh...Ok,” Lucius stuttered, he still couldn't believe this was happening, the fact that he would even accept something so out of his comfort zone.
“YES!” Vivian shouted throwing her hands around in excitement “Pick me up at the cafe around six PM and we will go from there,” she said as she pointed for Lucius to stop at a corner. “Well, see you in a few hours,” she said as she slammed the car door shut not even giving Lucius a chance to say something.
Lucius looked at his car’s clock and realized he had only five hours to get ready and be back to the cafe. The drive was quick because he only lived about ten minutes from the cafe. He quickly parked his car on the curb and went into his apartment building. The receptionist looked at him quickly then went back to whatever she was working on. Lucius always took the staircase; the elevator had a record of breaking down and being in a small enclosed space was not an option. His apartment was the last one at the end of a rather small hallway. He quickly entered with a sigh of relief. Everything in his apartment was in order and spotless. Lucius hated messes. His job allowed him to have his own private and spacious apartment with no roommate.
He checked his home phone, seeing that he has several missed calls from his mother.
She was probably calling to ask for money or tell him how useless and worthless he was. She had always been abusive to him, since his dad died when he was ten. Leaving the phone, he went to his bedroom to pick out an outfit. It took him quite a bit of time. He found the perfect pieces of clothing to wear: a blue striped polo shirt with jeans.
He quickly got changed and checked the mirror which felt like the fiftieth time. Lucius still couldn't quite understand why he was going through this much effort for a girl he just met. By the time he was done, he had twenty minutes until he had to go and pick her up. He spent the next ten minutes tidying up the mess he made from changing and making reservations.
When he was done, he quickly grabbed his wallet and rushed down the stairs to his car. He began to feel nervous, a feeling he hadn't had since his dad died. The feeling began to get worse as he got closer to the cafe. What if she decided she didn’t want to go on a date or if she decided she was too good for me? He parked in front of the cafe, hoping that she was already there. His hope was crushed when there was no one standing there. Regardless, he got out of his car and stood in front of the cafe, making himself more visible.
He waited for fifteen minutes before considering that possibly Vivian had changed her mind. Before he was about to jump into his car and forget the whole thing happened he heard, “So where are we going?”
The sudden sound scaring Lucius so badly he thought he might have a heart attack. “Don’t sneak up on me like that!” Lucius yelled earning looks from other people, Vivian frowned “That’s not a very good way to start a date,” she said crossing her arms. “I’m sorry, come on I have reservations at the grill.” The grill was one of the more popular restaurants in town and one of Lucius’s favorite places.
The drive there was longer than what he remembered, maybe it was because he was anxious, or he was just hungry. The awkward silence enveloped them the whole way there. Lucius had no idea what to say. He did not have the best social skills, especially with someone whom he was going on a date. When they finally arrived, he let a sigh of relief. He was hopeful that they would be too busy stuffing their face to worry about talking.
He didn’t notice that she had not changed a bit since he last saw her. Vivian was wearing the same tan trench coat as the last time he had seen her. To Lucius, it looked like she had not made any effort for the date whatsoever.
They entered the Grill. “Do you have reservations?” the waitress at the door asked.
“Yes. It’s under Lucius Varner,” he responded.
“Ah yes, table for one,” He looked at the waitress oddly for a second then held up two of fingers. “Follow me,” she said, as she showed the two their table. The table was in the corner of the restaurant, the bar was in the middle, while all the other tables seemed to wrap around it.
“ My name is Emily, and I’ll be your waitress. What can I get for you?” she asked, looking only at Lucius.
“I will have some water and…” he said looking at Vivian.
“I’m good,” Vivian replied as she waved him off.
“That’s it,” he finished.
“I’ll be right back with that, then,” Emily said as she wandered off. Vivian and Lucius spent the next hour or so talking about random subjects. They found out that they had a lot in common, but they also had a lot of differences.
When they got back out to the car they were both laughing and smiling, something Lucius hadn't done in a very long time. He felt warm and fuzzy. He couldn't describe the feeling, simply because he never felt it before. He started the car and began pulling out into the road.
“Thank you for an awesome night,” Vivian said planting a kiss on his cheek. He smiled the whole time he drove. When he turned the corner a bus smashed into them head on.
Lucius woke up in a completely white room: white walls, white sheets, white lights. He tried moving his arms, but they seemed to be restrained. He began to panic. He started jerking the restraining straps. The worst part was that he couldn't feel his right leg. The sheets revealed why; it was missing. Two nurses came rushing in. One was trying to calm him down, while the other took a needle and put it in what seemed to be his IV. Lucius began to feel dizzy and fell into a deep horrible sleep that was full of nightmares.
When he woke again, a large man was sitting in a chair, writing on papers. What they, were Lucius couldn't tell.
“WHO ARE YOU?! WHERE AM I?!” Lucius yelled, anger building up in him.
The man looked up and in a deep, gruff voice said, “You're in the hospital. My names is Detective Durwell. I’m here to ask you about the crash.”
In that moment all the memories came flooding back. Vivian, dinner, crashing, “Where's Vivian?” Lucius asked looking at the detective.
“Vivian?” the detective asked confused.
“Yes, the woman that was in the car with me.”
“Sir there was nobody in the car with you,” the detective replied, shifting in his chair.
“I'm positive Vivian was in the restaurant with me and when I was driving,” Lucius said, trying to stay calm.
“Sir, we had to ask the restaurant if you were under the influence of alcohol. They say you sat there drinking water and barely ate your food. They also said you were talking to yourself in full conversations.” The detective said standing up.
“NO YOU ARE LYING!” Lucius shouted, struggling against his restraints. He knew, just knew, that they were wrong.
“NURSE!” The detective shouted. A nurse responded to his call, running in and putting the morphine into his IV making Lucius fall asleep once again.
It has been six weeks since Lucius’s stay in the hospital. After he recovered, he’s been forced into a psychiatric hospital. His personal nurse was kind enough to reveal that information. He spent most of his days in a wheelchair because of his lost leg, and just staring out the window. Sometimes, if he tried hard enough, he could see Vivian staring right back at him.